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A few weeks later

by on Jul.09, 2014, under Personal

Well life goes on, no point in staying angry. I’m sure the doctors were just trying to be optimistic about the issue, I understand that now.

Just a quick little update post saying everything is good. 3 more months and I’ll be a dad. Yay!

No current track.

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Angry, Depressed, Defiant.

by on Jun.18, 2014, under Personal

About three weeks ago I took a pretty hard dodgeball shot to the face from point blank that I didn’t see coming at all at a tournament.

There were/are spots near the top middle of my field of vision as well as the top 1/4 of my eye that I can’t really see through. It’s distorting my vision in my right eye. It’s fairly disruptive if I try to only use my right eye to the point where things in my peripheral are clear, but as soon as I try to focus on it, because of the spots, it gets distorted and I can’t really see or make it out. I was then told that it was probably bruising and that at worst it was a retinal tear. Either way, it would heal or get repaired. Fast forward three weeks and I had my specialist exam. Upon further exam I was informed that the damage is permanent. I was shown a scan of my eye and in the scan there is about 15-25% of the back of the eye where the scan is dark. For the rest of my life I am stuck with this. I am partially blind in my right eye. It pains me to say that. But the title is correct.

I am angry because I was lied to. I was told that it would be better only to be told completely different later on. If I was told this right off the bat I would have probably not been angry. That false hope is painful to deal with, but now what can you do? I don’t normally get angry, but on the way to work I let out a pretty loud swear at the hopelessness of the matter. Then I realized that I can’t really change anything.

I am depressed because I cannot change this. I am sad because this is permanent. I’ve lost vision, there is no repairing the damage, the damaged part of the eye does not regenerate, I am stuck.

I am defiant because it will not change me. It will not affect my lifestyle. I will keep playing what I love, I will just take more care of myself and take more precautions. Over 10 years later I’m going back to my high school days and wearing goggles while playing sports. The doctor told me that I would eventually get used to it and that I would eventually not notice it at all and life will continue on.

So yes, that’s the story of the day. My life is changed. It’s a fact. Acknowledge it, accept it, let’s pretend it’s not there.

Current track: Sub Focus – Tidal Wave

PS. This is why I love Trance music. I can close my eyes, listen, and problems disappear.

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What’s gone on?

by on Apr.05, 2014, under Personal

There has been so much that has happened lately that I don’t know really where to begin. So I’ll do what I can chronologically.

I got married back on October 26th. My friends had a blast, I had a lot of fun and I solidified the life long commitment that I’ve made to my wife and future family. I say future family because I will also become a father in just over half a year from now.

How do I feel about that? It’s exciting, nervous, reinvigorating, and scary all at once. All my friends are excited about the fact I’m going to be a dad. It’s a pretty awesome thing to have happen and I look forward to being able to raise a child.

Chrystal isn’t handling it so well though, I mean physically. She’s been sick the entire time so far and it’s not been fun for her. Nothing but nausea the past 2 months. Put a pretty big damper on our honeymoon, we thought that she was early enough that we should still have a lot of fun. We did do a few cool things, tours to go snorkeling, relax on a white sandy beach, and swim with dolphins. We went to Cuba, stayed at Allegro in Varadero. It wasn’t too bad on the over all, the beach was fantastic. Drinks flowed free, I’m pretty sure I put down two bottles of rum myself the entire week. The food was almost the same every day and by the end of it, I was pretty unimpressed with the food. Chrystal couldn’t even get to the buffet by the end of it. The smell would make her throw up :( All it means is that we need a do over :)

With the news of a child on the way, the roommate has moved out for a few reasons. We need the space, he doesn’t want to live with a crying baby, and it’s nice to live as just Chrystal and I for a little bit before our lives change forever.

It’s also been a bad season for my sports. I’ve been afflicted with a lower back injury that took me out for 3 weeks and I’m currently on the tail end of an injured knee which I’ve been out for 3 weeks as well. I was good enough in the middle to get another dodgeball championship with the Ducks 😀 That said, we’ve won a few and the competition level isn’t there so we’re doing intermediate volleyball this season. A few of us have played, Vince and I play at a competitive level and Kyle played in high school so it should be interesting. If nothing it’s a change of what to do with the team.

Work has been good, my boss gave me a server to play with at home so I’m excited to do that. I can consolidate my two servers into one now using some of the same technology we use for our clients and just play with the newer stuff before we deploy to clients.

Current track:DJ RAM – Ramelia There’s a bit of story behind this track that makes it so moving. The DJ’s wife was in a war ravaged country, don’t remember where, and he was fighting hard to get her out of it, but due to passport issues, she was stuck. During the time apart, she died in the country, unable to get out.

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2 Huge laughs in the past 12 hours.

by on Sep.29, 2013, under Personal

So I figured I’d give “The Michael J. Fox Show” a try. Premise is that he is a famous news anchor in New York with Parkinson’s. In this particular episode the family is playing in a ball pit. Youngest son goes, “Wait guys, we lost dad.” Camera pans to an empty section of the ball pit that starts shaking and they move towards him. He gets up and goes, “How’d you find me?!” I laughed so hard. The show has promise.

I have always enjoyed his shows and I was very sad to hear that he got Parkinson’s years ago and the fact that he is back is wonderful.

Second funny factor. First watch this video:

Second, look at this image: The Fox

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The big 30

by on Mar.24, 2013, under Personal

My life has reached 30 years of existence today. Am I where I thought I’d be? Not exactly. Am I close? Not too far off.

I’ve mentioned it a few times in the past that I thought I would have been married by the time I was 25 and having kids by 27. I think that that could have been a possibility, but despite the fact that I’m not married yet, or having a kid yet, I’m not sad about it.

In the past 2 years I’ve made some incredibly amazing friends in the world of dodgeball. Playing on different teams every once in a while, but I always love my Duck Dodgers. That group of people will always hold a place in my heart as my first dodgeball team and most love. We’ve played together and grown together in the past 2, maybe 3 years. We’ve gotten better every step of the way, some more than others, but constantly growing. We’ve lost some people, but we’ve gained some too, but the most important thing is that we’ve always had fun as a team. We also play tournaments, sometimes as a team, sometimes as a draft option with a few other friendly teams we know. Essentially some people volunteer to be captains (I’m usually one of them), and then we just draw names from a hat. Gives you a bunch of different people to play with and better relationships with those people.

Still playing volleyball, will never stop. We recently won Battle of Alberta Intermediate Plus Volleyball tournament. The tier is one down from competitive which are full of ex-university players. People who would frankly destroy me and my team.  I do love my volleyball :)

We did get the venue mentioned previously, but I’ll talk about that later. My best friend’s wedding is in a little over a month away and I still have a toast to him and his wife to write. I know what I’m putting in it, but it’s a matter of making sure I put a full story together. I hope they don’t take the wrong message away when I give it :)

Well it’s time to head out for my birthday dinner and I’ll leave you with my best friend’s proposal video that he popped on her 3 years ago at one of his shows.

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